MISSING YOU....

I miss my friends.  Something awful.

Usually I'm okay about this stuff.  Detached in that independant way. 

But tonight I had a really great conversation with one of my best friends (something we haven't gotten to do in a very long time), and she really has been going through some shit in her life, and I'm not there.  I'm not there to drag her ass out to some local sleazy bar and say "just unload" and she would and I would say something utterly stupid but profound and make her laugh and it would lighten the load if even for a couple of tipsy crazy moments ... and life would be okay cause we would figure out a way to become instantly rich and we could tell everyone that is driving us freaking insane to go screw themselves because all we really need to do in life is have pretty boys serve us drinks on a beach and wipe the sweat off of our perfect (but aging) asses.  Yeah I miss that.

I also miss &/or envy when my two best friends get to do this venting - bonding without me.  It sucks cause I'm usually working my butt off and being a responsible adult - which by all means is not my favorite hat to wear. 

I have "other" friends.  And I get to have fun with these other friends.  But they do not fill the void of my my true buddies.  And I can't even express to my "true buddies" how much I miss them because that wouldn't be right because there isn't much to do about the whole situation anyway.

But as I sit in my hotel room - on my 4th beer - I just wish it was my 4th beer sitting in some sleazy bar telling some obnoxious story, with tears in my eyes and a "can you fucking believe this happened look on my face" because it's completely ridiculous - and my friends sitting across from me grabbing their stomach - or laughing so hard that there are tears in their eyes, because then we all would know that for that brief moment in time that all the shit that goes on in the real world - will still go on - but we have each other to lean on and it all doesn't seem so bad.

A real "insanity" check if you will ...

I miss them so much - homesickness is a real bitch. 

(and they don't understand why five weeks in Vegas seems like an eternity?) 

Comments

[lipanator]

We miss you too.
Sigh......